Chalk Drawings on the Sidewalk

Remember hopscotch? You know, how 3 and 4 and 8 and 9 were always side by side? How funny it felt to your wrist when you wrote on the bumpy spots? The colourful residue on your fingers?

Let's get back to basics, folks. I was walking home after a full day of class and volunteering and clashing with people, when I got a block away from my door and noticed that I was stepping on some blue squiggles. Luckily it was still light out and it hadn't rained since the morning beforehand, so I kept going, finding X's and suns with glasses along my way. Naturally I couldn't resist following the hopscotch squares for a little bit, and then "I love you."

It was written in front of me in yellow, along with "I [heart] you," then, "ILU." (This made me think of how earlier that day I'd written "IOU a hug" on a note to my boyfriend).

I got home and I was tired of how complicated and exceptional everything was. I'd spent the last 3 weeks being bitter from work, and rude to my friends and it took me nothing short of a dizzying busride to get me sick enough to stop for a minute. Time to suck it up, and ask for help. Something I was never okay with doing, even as a kid.

When I drew on the sidewalk, or took rides on my tricycle, or played with my Thomas O'Malley cat in my room in the afternoons, I was never so aware of being by myself. Now that concept has turned into things like alienation and solitude. And here I was so keen on independence.